a letter to my cult recruiter

I wrote a post, https://jeraldblackstock.ca/wp/2019/02/13/social-anxiety/  about how I was groomed from birth, (part of a future publication on my deprogramming from the abuse of the cult recruiters of Yasodhara Ashram), by a narcissist borderline personality parent, which made me a prime target for the cult recruiters, Sylvia Hellman and Susan Oughtred.

Using the narcissist stare, these two emulated a mothers love, that unblinking bonding look a mother has for her child, and like my own mother, abusively used it for purposes of manipulation and creating life long dependance. 


Those gentle affirmations I saw today in your video on the Ashram site, that you are never quite good enough, but by buying more courses and donating more labour…..


Anything that puts a person down in this way is an abuse.
Any person who categorically dissects a person as being ‘unworthy’ is an abuser.
Any system (such as Kundalini Yoga) which does the same is fascist as defined by Dr. Albert Ellis. (https://jeraldblackstock.ca/wp/2018/03/21/the-case-against-religion/)


Susan, I saw your video, on the Ashram site telling people that they were losers, and they should send more money and give up more of their lives, to become people of self esteem, as defined by you.
This is a formula as old as time to manipulate with fear, obligation and guilt. Simply put, it is a carnival trick to sell snake oil. It goes like this:
1. You are broken, unevolved or whatever. Anything that starts with ‘you’ then describes you negatively is an abuse. 
2. I’m going to fix it.Yoga courses or whatever the snake oil du jour is. That’s the power imbalance of the abuser proclaiming her enlightenment or some such magic that you don’t have because of your brokenness. 
3. It’s going to cost you money. This is where they start raping your bank account, like any good con artist. 
4. You have to keep coming back. That’s the abuse of dependency creation, the money shot as they say. The reason you have to keep coming back is that it doesn’t work. 

In fact, as any ruthless leech knows, the victim gets sicker of course, and eventually either dies, I almost suicided, or gets deprogrammed at the hospital where this is well known, and I was smart enough to go and seek treatment.. The treatment is to start seeking evidence for your beliefs that you have been programed in: that you are a broken loser. There never is any evidence.


In fact the health system is the opposite of an abusive cult like Yasodhara Ashram in the following ways.  Doctors seek evidence, they are evidence based. They really like it when you don’t come back. It’s called a cure. In my country, initiated (there’s that word) by me and my friends in the Liberal party, this treatment is free. 100%
In contrast, your ‘treatments’ (leaching of time and money) cost a lot, hurts people, and they don’t work, based on evidence. They are extremely authoritarian, an attempt to keep control of and demanding inappropriate self sacrifice, such as giving up sex and other fundamental needs of communication and companionship.

People who don’t get their basic needs met for communication, companionship and sex become anxious, and the yoga woo woo (prayer, meditation, chanting etc.) is a good distraction from the intentionally induced anxiety, but not a cure. In fact the distraction from the induced extreme anxiety feels so good it gets called a spiritual experience or enlightenment.

Extreme authoritarianism used to induce this anxiety is also known as fascism. (What was it that Sylvia Hellman did during the second world war in Germany to survive? Another friendly fascist?)


People who don’t get their needs met for communication, companionship and sex become anxious, and people who stay anxious long enough became depressed, and people who stay depressed long enough suicide. All rolled up in a mother’s love, the narcissists stare.


So, this is fair warning, I will be writing and publishing on your cult and my deprogramming, and how I almost died, but got help, barely in time. So, using not only my personal experience with your organization, and you, in classes for several years at Radha House and Yasodhara Ashram, as well as commonly available references on cults and the harm you people do my intent is to break the shame at being conned by you creatures. My art site just past a million views, my work on my publisher’s site just passed 3 million views, my google reviews just passed 11,000 views. In the last six months. 
My references are:

 

The Practice of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy: Second Edition. By Albert Ellis, PhD, Windy Dryden, PhD

The Case Against Religion – by Albert Ellis, PhD

Boundaries Are the Best Protection Against Narcissists, Borderlines and Other Predators –  by Dr Tara J. Palmatier, PsyD



In a alternate universe Susan, we would have been friends and lovers, a great match in so many ways. Two artists, romantics, who love our cats Dear Jethro, Dear Leopold, and many other compatibilities, our love for music and dance, and for each other, for example.

These were the very things that made us vulnerable to charmingly ruthless, manipulative, competitive, jealous, cult recruiters in the first place. When we were starting to bond as humans do, so Sylvia Hellman sent you to Germany, to get you away, she had plans for you as a recruiter, your desires and your life didn’t matter, she planned to suck your very life away for her purposes. I didn’t matter either, fortunately as it turned out, I couldn’t recreate a mothers love as well as you, I don’t have the narcissist stare; the bait on the hook. 
Who says the hook doesn’t hurt the fish?

JeraldBlackstock dip. (Alberta University of the Arts), BFA, CPF.

www.jeraldblackstock.ca   

Sylvia Hellman cult recruiter

Susan Oughtred cult recruiter

Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships

 

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